.Editor's Details: The observing is the message of a letter from Expedition 3 Commander Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reflecting on the occasions of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I have not written very much regarding specifics of this mission during the month I've been below, mostly for two reasons: the very first being that there has actually been really little bit of time to do that type of creating, as well as secondly given that I am actually uncertain exactly how comfortable I am actually sharing ideas I provide family and friends with the rest of the globe.Properly, clearly the world altered today. What I say or even carry out is very small reviewed to the value of what occurred to our country today when it was actually assaulted by ... through whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we know, I reckon. Challenging to understand at whom to point our temper as well as concern ...I had only ended up a number of duties today, the most lengthy being actually the physical exams of all crew participants. In a private talk adhering to that, the flight specialist told me they were having an extremely negative time on the ground. I had no tip ...He defined the situation to me as greatest he understood it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was dumbfounded, at that point frightened. My first idea was actually that this wasn't a genuine chat, that I was actually still listening closely to some of my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply really did not seem to be possible on this incrustation in our nation. I could not also imagine the particulars, also before the information of further damage started coming in.Vladimir came by pretty promptly, sensing that one thing incredibly serious was actually being reviewed. I swung Michael in to the module also. They were also impressed and also stunned. After our team authorized off, I tried to reveal to Vladimir as well as Michael as greatest I might the potential measurement of this show of horror in downtown New york as well as at the Pentagon. They clearly comprehended as well as were actually really supportive.I eyed the Planet Map on the computer to observe where over the planet our team were actually and discovered that our company were happening southeast away from Canada as well as would be passing over New England in a couple of moments. I zipped around the terminal till I found a home window that would certainly give me a scenery of NYC and also ordered the nearest electronic camera. It took place to be a video camera, and I was appearing south coming from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke seemed to be to have a strange bloom to it at the foundation of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the city. After going through among the newspaper article our team only received, I feel our company were checking out NY around the time of, or even quickly after, the failure of the 2nd high rise. Exactly how terrible ...I swung the electronic camera all along the East Shoreline to the south to see if I might observe every other smoke around Washington, or even anywhere else, yet absolutely nothing showed up.It was fairly difficult to deal with work afterwards, though our team possessed some to carry out, yet on the following track our company traversed the United States further south. All 3 of us were actually working 1 or 2 video cameras to attempt to receive viewpoints of New York or even Washington. There was fog over Washington, yet no details resource might be found. All of it looked amazing from two to three hundred kilometers away. I can't envision the heartbreaking scenes on the ground.Aside from the emotional impact of our nation being actually tackled as well as countless our people as well as maybe some buddies being gotten rid of, the most overwhelming sensation being where I am actually is just one of seclusion.Next day ... I suspect the exhaustion and also psychological pressure got the most ideal of me. I could not keep awake and remain to write. Today was actually still hard, yet we began getting more details, plus our experts had the honor of chatting directly along with the Facility Director, Roy Estess, that ensured our company that the ground crews would certainly remain to work as well as guarantee our protection, along with the secure function of the Station. We additionally heard from our Manager, Mr. Goldin, who added that the partners in the Plan are actually all totally devoted to continuing safe functions and help. These were never ever questions for me. I understand all these folks! The ground crews have been actually exceptionally encouraging, very understanding of the influence of the updates, as well as have tried to become as beneficial as possible. They have all been really expert as well as concentrated though I can't envision the interruption of this particular form of news coming in and the thought that federal government properties may be at risk. They never bypassed a beat, even when relocating nerve center. And a team of senior staffs and also pals provided us a fairly complete instruction on what was recognized as well as what was actually being carried out in the federal government and also at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was quite handy as well as sort of them to do in the midst of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has actually additionally been actually helpful and useful, trying to uplink news articles when our personal properties were actually unusable, and stating kind terms ...My crewmates have actually been actually excellent, also. They know it is actually been actually a difficult time for me as well as the people on the ground, and also they've tried to become as even keeled and valuable as possible. Michael even corrected me my favorite Borscht soup for supper. As well as they offer me plenty of area to assume when I required it. They are actually extremely compassionate and naturally shocked at whoever will do this.I recognize plenty of individuals in Washington, numerous people that journey to DC and NYC, numerous that are actually pilots, that I really felt certain I would certainly obtain a minimum of a few parts of trouble over the upcoming handful of days. I received the first one today when I knew that the Leader of the American Airlines jet that hit the Pentagon was Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I came across Chic during the course of plebe summertime when our team remained in the D&B together, as well as we had lots of training class with each other. I can't visualize what he must of gone through, and right now I hear that he might have climbed even further than our company can easily also think about through perhaps stopping his plane from being the one to deal with the White Home. What an awful reduction, but I ensure Chic was actually dealing with fearlessly to the end. And splits don't move the very same in space ...It is actually hard to explain exactly how it really feels to be the only United States completely off the planet at a time like this. The sensation that I must be there with each one of you, dealing with this, helping somehow, is difficult. I know that our company get on the threshold (or beyond) of a terrible shift in the background of the world. A lot of points will never ever coincide once more after September 11, 2001. Certainly not just for the manies thousand and 1000s of people straight affected by these horrendous process of terrorism, however probably for everybody. Our experts will discover our own selves really feeling in a different way about dozens of factors, consisting of possibly room expedition, sadly.It is actually terrible to observe smoke cigarettes putting from injuries in your very own nation coming from such an amazing vantage point. The dichotomy of performing a space probe dedicated to boosting live on the planet and watching life being ruined by such willful, terrible process is actually jolting to the mind, despite who you are actually. And the knowledge that every little thing are going to be actually various than when our experts released due to the opportunity our team land is actually a little disconcerting. I believe in our country and also in our leadership that our experts are going to perform everything possible to much better guard her and also our family members, and to take fair treatment of what has been actually carried out. I have peace of mind that the great people at NASA are going to perform every little thing necessary to continue our mission safely as well as return our team safely and securely at the correct time. As well as I overlook all of you quite. I can not exist with you face to face, as well as our experts possess a very long way to go to finish our mission, but be specific that my center is actually with you, as well as understand you are in my petitions.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the final character ... Fortunately, it is actually been an occupied week up here. And to confirm that, like our country, our experts are actually continuing our designated pathway with organization customarily (as much as feasible). Tonight the current add-on to the station, the Russian Docking Area will definitely be introduced coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (United States opportunity), it will certainly dock with our company, at a port never ever utilized prior to on the low point edge of the Company Element. This brand-new element will certainly offer us one more spot to dock a Progress or even Soyuz as well as will give a sizable airlock with pair of useable hatches for carrying out EVA's in Russian Orlan fits, which we will definitely carry out a few of prior to our company get home.The issue prior to in taking care of today was inadequate updates. The issue right now is actually way too much. It arrived simultaneously when email was restored, and there's inadequate opportunity to review it all! Plus it is actually as well difficult to deal with all of it immediately. However I cherish receiving it, as well as I actually cherish the wonderful letters of assistance as well as friendship I am actually acquiring.Our team are actually prospering aboard, obtaining our job done, and also referring to factors. Last night our company possessed a long dialogue over dinner concerning the value of these activities, the feasible actions to comply with, as well as what must be actually carried out. After supper, Michael resolved telling me that every email he obtained from buddies in Russia said specifically to tell me exactly how regretful they were that this taken place, expanding their condolences, as well as asking just how I was actually performing. Vladimir showed me the Russian word for "acknowledgements" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian and the English terms are actually considerably very long to verbalize easily.) Incredibly type people.For the final two days, the Russian MCC has sufficed to transfer real-time shows of broadcast headlines regarding the celebration as well as associated tales, to see to it I was properly informed. Every specialist who has started the line to discuss a procedure or even an issue has at some aspect prolonged introductions to me with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom told our team that because of the wedding of recognition in the United States, throughout the day individuals had been bringing florals and also lining all the walls of the US consular office in Moscow, and this evening they were igniting candles in the street outside the consulate. How the world has changed.People anywhere seem to realize the senselessness and horror within this strike. And the tremendous reduction. Moscow has coped with these type of complications in the final handful of years with condo and metro bombings, so they are actually as restless to do away with this hazard as we are actually. But the bottom collection is that there are great folks anywhere that desire to live in tranquility. I review that a child asked, "America is thus good to various other countries, our team regularly assist everyone, exactly how can they loathe our team so much?".I wish the example of participation and also depend on that this space capsule plus all the people in the program illustrate daily will one day encourage the remainder of the globe to operate the same way. They must!Sadly, our experts won't be piloting over the United States while people are igniting candles. Do not recognize if our team could see that anyway. Our experts performed, having said that, view an incredibly uncommon and attractive view a couple of moments ago: the launch of our Docking Compartment on a Soyuz booster. Our team were overtaking it as well as it emerged about three mins after its own launch from Baikonur as the sun struck our terminal, so it was still in the dark. It appeared like a large comet with a directly, vast rear silhouetted versus the darker earth underneath. In spite of some negative lights for a while as the sunlight reached our home window at a reduced angle, I dealt with some online video of it as first we passed the rocket, and afterwards viewed it begin to catch up as it acquired elevation as well as velocity. I recorded till main engine deadline and also enhancer separation happened just as we came close to dawn on the Mountain ranges. A memorable attraction in an unforgettable week ...Life takes place, even in space. Our company are actually listed here to keep ... Frank.